Category Archives: rants and rambling muse with views

The NBN is a nation-building thang

The NBN is a nation-building thang

It helped decide an election

I long for a fast and lasting Internet connection

But I dont like the NBN’s chances of getting an erection

I’ll go on having  a coffee and a read of the paper

As my webpages gasp and struggle to refresh

I’ll miss that great bargain on eBay as my bid turns up 10 seconds late

My downloads, in their many forms

Face a long and uncertain fate

The Coalition would prefer we have a slower, cheaper connection

Using technology that is made up of wires, sticks, glue and blu-tack

The Rainbow Government members really like the NBN and the part it played in their election

But they have a cost blow-out fear and tales of householder connnection rejection

So let’s just get on with it Australia

We cant be the slow ones on the net

Let’s just build the best one

That everyone can afford to get

Might I offer a word or two to the wise for the pollies

Do it once – do it well – do it for everyone

Just drop the politics and agree that the NBN is a nation-building-thang.

3 Dozen things about life

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often.
3. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.
4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.
6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
8. A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.
12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.
13. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see the baby’s head emerging.
1 4. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
16. A balanced diet is a beer and burger in each hand.
17. Middle age is when the broadness of your mind and the narrowness of the waist swap.
18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
19. Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.
20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
24. Someone who thinks logically provides nice contrast to the real world.
25. It ain’t the jeans that make your arse look big.
26. If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved it’s full potential, that word would be ‘meetings’.
27. There is a very fine line between ‘hobby’ and ‘mental illness.’
28. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
29. You should not confuse your career with your life.
30. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.
31. Never lick a steak knife.
32. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
33. Cashing in your daylight savings will not get you a longer life.
34. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
35. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that deep down inside we ALL believe we are good drivers.
36. Your real friends will still love you – no matter what.